Arizona Cardinals Derek anderson Fans Jon Gruden Kent Somers MNF Money
by bholt11
5 comments
Derek Anderson and Reality
Coors Light commercial, much?
Derek Anderson made the news on Monday night, and because he’s Derek Anderson, it wasn’t for outstanding play.
No, as you probably know, Anderson made the news for going off on Kent Somers, the Arizona Cardinals beat writer for the Arizona Republic. Somers questioned Anderson on why he was “caught” by cameras laughing on the sidelines during the fourth quarter of a game that his team was trailing by 18 points.
Not willing to admit that he was laughing because his team is still technically playoff-eligible in the anemic NFC West, Anderson took to making a very confused argument that went something like this.
It’s none of your business… I wasn’t laughing… Maybe I was laughing… No, I wasn’t laughing… I work really hard every week… NOTHING IS FUNNY… I’m going home.
This turns into the typical, modern-day sports story where sportswriters say athletes are jerks, and athletes say that sportswriters don’t understand the sidelines.
In short, I hate these kinds of stories. Mainly because I have a strong distaste for sportswriters who push a little too far and then somehow become symbolic martyrs for their profession. Somers asked the same question somewhere between six and 659 times. A strategy that is fine for a sit-down, in-depth interview. But the kind of thing that will easily piss off an entire press room full of people waiting for their turn to ask a question.
Take it from the guy who once used up the last question of a press conference to ask a guy what kind of boat he owns.
That’s why this post was almost named “Why Nobody Likes Sportswriters, Part II.”
But then I heard Somers’ explanation and it was fair enough. After the screenshot and Jon Gruden mention of Anderson’s sideline exuberance, Somers received tweet after tweet and E-mail after E-mail from miserable Cardinal fans asking why Derek was so damn happy.
Since Somers’ prime audience is obviously Cardinal fans, it was simply his job to give them a little bit of an angry voice in the press conference. He did his job and I honestly felt a tiny bit sorry for the guy when I heard him on ESPN today. Except I didn’t because it was probably his life goal to be on ESPN, but I digress.
After listening to Somers, I felt the need to turn my attention to the fuel behind this entire event. Yes, the fans.
This is where this turns into the most hypocritical post ever. Because, yes Cardinal fans, I am like you. I am loyally bound to my teams through all kinds of sunny and dreary weather. I overreact to everything. Literally everything.
I scream, I pace, I punch couches and throw things. All in the name of games that I have absolutely zero control over. Watching games with me is not fun, and I actually feel a little sympathy for the people who do.
But I know that I am not anywhere close to being alone in all of this. I know that last night there were rabid Cardinal fans absolutely fuming over the sight of their quarterback smiling during defeat. HOW DARE HE!?!?
Well, here’s the thing. Get over it.
The painful fact is that you care about this all so much more than Derek Anderson that it’s not even comparable.
Does Derek Anderson suck? For sure.
Do the Cardinals suck? Certainly.
But you see, Anderson is making a smooth $645k, and you’re getting paid in tears and a growing lack of productive time management. He is living out his dream while your dreams of a Super Bowl rely on him.
Sure, he works hard and he wants to win and he loves being a Cardinal as long as they’re paying him. But that doesn’t mean that the girls in the Phoenix bars give a damn about who won or lost on Monday night. And that’s probably been his life since roughly the fourth grade.
Derek Anderson has it good. If you were living his life, you probably wouldn’t care as much as he does either. In fact, he was probably playing a round of golf in the desert and sipping on an ice-cold beer while you were pulling your hair out at work today over “your” season being over.
So remember, feel free to stay angry, football fans. I’ll be right there with you. But try to understand that your favorite football team is pretty much never going to share your emotions.
-Bryan
I almost threw the “sarcastic” bit into my post. If you’re going to ask an edgy question, giving it a preface is the dumbest thing you can do. As soon as the reporter starts to talk, you can pretty much just see Anderson thinking “yep, this question is going to piss me off.”
It’s like calling your mom and starting off with “I have some bad news.” Just jump in and save the extra suckiness.
I don’t blame Anderson at all. If I was a pro athlete, I’d pretty much have that attitude with a lot of newspaper reporters. Seriously, newspapers are almost always going to write terrible things about athletes, especially after a loss. The well-respected magazine writers are different. Gary Smith all damn day.
And yeah, I’m certified insane during games. I probably should watch games by myself, but I don’t. Last year’s Bucs season was the most refreshing thing ever because they sucked so bad that I didn’t care anymore. In fact, I was angry when they won because I wanted Suh.
“Last year’s Bucs season was the most refreshing thing ever because they sucked so bad that I didn’t care anymore. In fact, I was angry when they won because I wanted Suh.”
Samesies. But with the Seahawks. And I want Cam Newton.
If you’re Derek Anderson, do you get points for saying:
“You know what, I was in a terrible mood. We were getting blown out by a mediocre team. Deuce came over to cheer me up. Told a really funny dick joke and I’m only human. Sorry if it looked bad… I want this just as bad as you do. And if I didn’t, I wouldn’t be playing behind one of the worst offensive lines in football. To be honest, they really don’t pay me enough to take this kind of merciless beating week after week. And on top of the aches and bruises, I have to put up with bullshit questions like this from hack reporters who’d sell their child to bump their otherwise canned column to A1. So yeah, it was a dick joke. That’s what happened. Go *uck yourself, Kent.” ?
Because that’s what I would’ve said.
[...] if you haven’t heard about Derek Anderson’s blow up, you should go check out Holt’s post over at Sports Casualties. It’s pretty [...]
Any time you have to preface a question with “I’m not trying to be sarcastic”, you probably shouldn’t ask said question. I agree that the fans are way too emotional, though. I get the same way. The Apple Cup is this weekend, and for the past 4 years, I’ve watched alone. I just can’t watch the game against my most hated rivals with other people. I’ll break stuff, I’ll scream obscenities, I’ll pound my chest. So I’m right there with you, Holt.
I don’t really blame the guy for asking the question, but you can’t really blame Anderson for the response, either. So if he’s gonna be a dick and ask the question (he was) then don’t get pissed when he doesn’t give some watered-down apology or explanation. I hate how sports writers can be dicks to everyone and badger athletes, and when they decide not to answer questions anymore, suddenly, the athlete is the jerk. If you want some real humor, look up Steve Kelley (who might be the worst journalist in America) vs. Erik Bedard. It’s fantastic in the worst way.