Gator Nation Rethinking Personal Brand, Y’all

Feelin sad for Gator Nation

Just want them 2 help me get a job/find a unique personal brand to exploit 4 money

Just wanna be able 2 go 2 second floor of Westie and “reserve a multimedia” room 2 practice my “group presentation” on a theory that failed to be relevant to culture/society/America/the world, but is still being taught by “communications graduate programs” because it is “seminal”

Just don’t want the guy on the third floor to tell me “our reservation system is temporarily down. come back again next year when we might have it up. and also, haha i can do nothing to help u”

Just want the guy on the third floor to admit “i’m making $23/hour just for sitting at this desk because nobody checks out ‘books’ anymore b/c steve jobs is ‘making my job disposable’. maybe I can use my ample time and bright purple shirt and pants up to 3-inches above my navel to help this young man, but instead I’ll say, ‘there’s nothing i can do to help you reserve a multimedia room 4 monday at 4:15 b/c we don’t have the protocol/infrastructure/bureaucracy in place’”

Even if I’m a grad student?

Especially if you’re a graduate student

Feel like ‘picking the low hanging fruit’ should be more popular phraze in apple orchards than ifas conference rooms.

Starting to think that gator nation has lost its grip on America via not having anyone ‘write great american novel/cure cancer’, but instead focusing on losing 3 football games/doing away with spread offense/giving Urban Legend heart palpitations

sometimes i think that i have more stress than urban meyer.

sometimes i think that 20 years of school/20 years of A’s makes me want to quit school/stop getting As/become baker in France.

Wonder if France has higher/lower unemployment for 18-24 y-olds than 20.4%?

Wonder if French schools teach u 2 get newspaper or ‘old media’ jobs even tho these don’t exist?

Maybe the college of communications should go back-2 using typewriters for writing on papyrus 2 present a more ‘consistent brand’

Was Bryan Holt right when he said, “i do not like green eggs and ham. i’m moving to TV where I will have a job/be around better looking people”?

Feeling like there’s no money in ‘doing what you love’ unless doing what u luv involves microbiology/cellular reduction technology/running 4.2 40.

should have been born taller w/ longer wingspan… want 2 b able 2 dunk on y’all

Starting to rethink this whole ‘grad school’ thing. starting to question it like i’m starting 2 question choice of posts

worrying right now that my pops <via fatherhood> doesn’t read hipsterrunoff, worrying that he stopped reading/has no context for lack of punctuation/writing style

thought about finishing ‘week 7 nfl picks’ but just got so frustrated working w/ ‘other grad students’ who have 1-track minds <via loving theory>. just wanted to do something different.

just want to b different.

Does it bother you that phD students are PhD students so that they can be professors? So that they can teach more theory? So that they can pursue a career in ‘promoting stagnation’.

It’s a never-ending cycle, y’all. Feel like atreyu in ‘never ending story.’ it ‘goes on it goes on it goes on’

just want to b like kevin arnold in neverending story so i can join a buzzband/work at mcdonalds.

Wonder if harvard/princeton/rice/private school with resources is rethinking personal brand via ‘treating students like shit’/teaching old ways way of doing things’ or whether they are forward thinking and creating 2morrow’s world leaders that will ‘be my boss’s boss one day.

just want to think of a better, faster, stronger, more daft punk-inspired internet meme than ‘sports casualties’ so that i can be ‘more relevant’. wonder if they make steroids/hgh for internet memes.

wonder who the roger clemens of internet memes is?

just want to learn html 5 or php so that i can be ‘valuable 2 society’

aren’t we all just trying to be more ‘relevant’ within our own social circles, so that we can lead our own social circles into mutual agreements with other, more cooler/better social circles?

prolly shoud’ve gone to ‘the u’ <via 5 national championships>. feel like they were well prepared for losing 3 football games (and more than 3 football games) via an outstanding demonstration of academic prowess.

just want to go 2 ‘the u’/be bad at football, but hold my degree up and say proudly ‘i am number 47th overall in the country!”

really just want to start a blogging empire with offthestands, thezebraowl, kylerancourt.com. just want to have a rat pack of bloggers and be ‘relevant in the buzzosphere’.

i want 2 create buzz 4 a living.

no-grain-no-pain can join 2 even tho she writes about health. maybe she can be ‘buzzosphere secretary of health/gluten free meals/casual fridays’

'all 2morrow's parties (will serve tofu hotdogs)'

i am sorry for writing this, bryan. i will buy you a budweiser/PBR/other beverage that signifies ‘america in a bottle’ as repayment for letting me write this. thank you for letting me write this <via not being a dictatorial editor like the woman i work for (via saying ‘i don’t love it’ a lot and not offering constructive feedback)>

also, sorry 4 using ‘smokin’ hot’ 2 often and 4 talking about azian girls 2 much.

love asian girls.

love u asian girls.

just want to talk 2 The Girl in the Blue Dress on Thursdays. she looks normal standing in line for coffee in einsteins at 8thirty on tuesday morning. but she is beautiful on thursday nights, even tho she is not Asian.

To The Girl in the Blue Dress: i love the way u put your hair in a bun/your eyes.

when will my professor realize that the newspaper has no intrinsic value over the iPad? When will she realize that once poor people <via low socioeconomic status> have iPads from food stamps, that the newspaper will cease to exist?

I want 2 tell her ‘newspapers are dead’.

My sister, who was being born in 1991, has never ever picked up a newspaper in her life. not because she ‘is apathetic’ or ‘socially unaware’, but b/c she is ‘young’ <via being 19>. just 5 years younger. and yet, the newspaper is ‘dead to her/never even existed’

hope my sister supports me <via money/iPad food stamps> when she gets a web design job like skhot. maybe she’ll send me checks when i’m sitting in my cave writing on papyrus for the 12 ppl who ‘read newspapers religiously/like the feel of newspaper/think technology is from ‘the pit of hell and or satan’.

feel like these people might be in ‘weimer hall’

just wanna be a hipster and move to new york. just want to be a baker in france. just want 2 b ‘more relevant’

I want to tell you that i’m sitting here ‘on campus’ under a tree, using wi-fi that google gave me for free. bet larry page didn’t go to a communications collge.

mr. page, can i sell you a newspaper?

I’m trying to be ‘more positive about my long-term prospects’ theze days. i want to believe in hope/change/’universal health care 4 rich ppl’, but just 2 busy looking for a more marketable personal brand than ‘saying hi to u when u walk into Wal-Mart’.

do you have a job? are you happy with your level of relevance in proportion 2 the ppl around you on thursday nights?

week 7 nfl picks, you can wait my friend.

when led zeppelin wrote ‘communication breakdown’, were they talking about

just want to be better than a stale immitation of another blog. just want to spell ‘imitation’ right/have ‘automatic corrective type-function’ on my iPhone.

I’m reconsidering my personal brand, y’all. want to b a chill bro, but want ppl to ‘hear my voice’ as well. I want to change the world like barack obama.

I luv u, barack. you seem to be a down-to-earth bro. just wish u were a ‘better president’.

2night i’m going to a halloween party. i wanted to be a newspaper, but i’d probably just sit there in the corner with other ppl who dressed up as newspapers – waiting desperately for someone to come ‘pick me up’ <via metaphors> – but really just watching the vampires and pumpkins talk to the people who dressed up as ‘the cloud’/'apple products’/'wi-fi’/'laptops’

adopt me, steve jobs.

Uncle Steve

just want this to be the longest post ever. maybe then it will stand out. maybe then it will ‘be relevant’ in relation to the other 306 posts. bryan, we forgot to pat ourselves on the back for post 300. Congratulations 2 me/bryan.

maybe now is the time to be the Jerry McGuire of ‘bloggable’ memos. maybe now it is time to stay up all night and tell ppl ‘you are thinking about this all wrong/you will be left behind if you don’t change/you have been left behind already’

1 day, i will do something great.

1 day, i will be relevant 2.

robles.